The Power of "Story"

I hung up my laminated map... then noticed that the voyage of Nathaniel Bowditch that was traced on it was faded.... so I re-traced it... and remember the story... then I drew the voyage from a favorite book, By the Great Horn Spoon, on the map.... and then, I remembered the route of Gladys Aylward... and the Pilgrims... and Lewis and Clark.... and Esteban... The Witch of Blackbird Pond... and Mary Slessor and William Carey...

This sparked a discussion with my oldest son and my oldest daughter, my first and fifth children, as they recalled the stories that these voyages were connected with... and that led to us pouring over my library shelves, talking about various books that we have read... I am always amazed that when I read a title of a book that I have read in the past, not only do details come back to me that I would've thought I'd forgotten, but even moreso, the FEELINGS of how I felt when I read the book come back like a flood. We spent over two hours pulling books off the shelves and remembering the stories and the feelings... Someday, I'd like to be able to say that I read every book that I own, but right now, I could not say that... let's just say, I have a lot of books. ;-)

Listening to my kids talk about these stories, I thought about how passionate I feel about "story" and its impact on how we see the world.... The difference "story" has made in my life is incredible and hard to explain. It has made me who I am.

I can't say that I have been able to get all of my kids to love to read... partly because of learning challenges some have had..... but all of my kids LOVE "story." They all love what they learn from either reading "story" or hearing "story." A few have even learned from acting out "story" in plays or skits.

As I tell my Christian literature class, "story" is important to how we view the world and all truly good, classic stories will have an element of His Story... the story that our great Author is writing that we have become the characters in.... We step into the story at the precise time when He decides we should, and we do not know the next chapter until we step into it. When we read other people's stories and are confronted with their dilemmas, we have a little better understanding of the world we live in, what we believe about it, and how to cope with it.... and we are shaped, little by little, by what we read.

To me, reading and learning to love "story" is one of the most important aspects of becoming educated.... and when my kids talk about these books that I own...or relate stories from the most important Book-- THE Story.... my heart rests in knowing that they are truly becoming educated.

How Can This Be?!

It was 6 years ago.... on an early Thursday morning, that the Lord began to speak to me about my sister....even though, the last emails I had received were positive and talked of her getting better and eventually going to a rehab facility, I sensed that something wasn't right.... I began to pray and sob and cry out to the Lord.... I wrestled for three hours at least, until finally around 3 am, I was able to pray, "Thy will be done...." Peace washed over me in that moment... I fell asleep....

Six hours later, I received the phone call that my sister was not going to survive her illness... I was told that she was not doing well during the night, and they worked on stabilizing her, but it wasn't until around 3 am that she finally stabilized... I was told that there was nothing more they could do....

We drove to Chicago, and I remember being swaddled in His peace.... all the way there... I kept thanking Him....I listened to praise music in the car and worshiped Him all the way to the hospital.... I was thankful that I had prayed that prayer the night before, and wasn't forced to do it now....

The Lord walked those days so very close to me.... when I walked into that hospital and saw my sister's body, and when I was in a different hospital 3 days later delivering Abigail. He was right there with me... He never left me..... I never felt Him closer than I did during that time...

I admit that I couldn't understand why my sister died, but I didn't really feel the need to question God why.... When I first got to the hospital, and found out that she had died a full hour before I arrived, all I could say, over and over was, "How can this be?" Remembering, even then, that these were the words that Mary asked the angel Gabriel when he revealed the miracle that God was going to do in her life. She didn't ask Him why, nor tell Him He couldn't, nor did she argue with Him, but only asked, "How? How can this be?"

That was what I wanted to know... "How can this be?" How can I live life without my sister? How can my sister's family live without her? How can my heart ever not be broken? How can I ever stop feeling alone?! How?!

But, He has been faithful every step of the way... He did not expect me to recover quickly, though it seemed like everyone else did... He did not expect me to pull myself together because life goes on........ His process of healing and recovery has been gentle, with an order to it, and a timeliness..... even when others wanted to rush me along, He never did.... so it has taken me this full 6 years to come this far.... I couldn't do it any faster....and some healing is still yet to come.....

I still don't have a lot of answers to my questions, but I do know this, "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength," and that is how.......